Saturday, May 06, 2006

Wiggin' out in Wallyworld!


Oh, if you only knew how hesitant my fingers are to type the following words on this blog. Part of me is telling myself to STOP and to DELETE everything I have typed so far; while the other part of me is saying, don't stop anything. This is the most "blog worthy" entry you've had yet. It is also a story that I know I will regret telling my oh so loving family and friends in the years.....and years.....and years to come. I will never live this one down. (big sigh) Hold on to your hats folks this is a good one! I can't believe I'm doing this. Here I go!
Ok, so it's saturday and I've been doing stuff around the house all day. Cleaning, ironing, picking up toys, etc... I have to go to the store today too, but I'm trying to hold off until the last possible moment because as you all know I HATE GROCERY SHOPPING! Anyway, I finally decide to bite the bullet and go around 2:45 this afternoon. Jimmy is going to be at home working on the computer so I leave the girls for him to watch and I just take Andy with me. One kid is not so bad; it's three that will send me over the edge.
So we're off to Wal-Mart. I have a half-written list in my purse of the things I need to get while I'm there. I wasn't able to sit down long enough today and make out a complete list, so again I'm going on memory. Now, let me just stop right here and remind you all that my memory has been lacking in the last couple years. Just a few posts ago I wrote an entry about how Emily has to tell me to "remembuh dat" constantly. I just want to make sure you all understand that I'm not exaggerating the "fewer brain cells" theory. It is completely true!
Ok, so like I said, I'm dictating to myself a grocery list on the way to Wal-Mart. I'm trying to remember to get jelly, excedrin, dish soap and formula just to name a few. I pull up into the parking lot and get out. Like most of us Wal-Mart regulars I have a system of walking through the store. I always start on the side with the medical supplies and tolietries and then work my way around through the toys, home items, electronics, crafts and then groceries. Well, today was no different. I had to pick up some Excedrin for Jimmy so my first stop was in the medicine department. I spent about 2-3 minutes browsing around there before I noticed that they had the new "Summer" aisle stocked. I walked through that whole section looking at all the cool new swimming and summer stuff for the kids. I passed by the sunscreen and debated on buying some, when I couldn't quite remember if I already had some at home. All I could think about was how expensive that stuff is. They have tons of different brands and types and none of them are cheap. Needless to say I opted to check at home first. I probably spent another 5-7 minutes looking in this section before I slowly made my way to the back of the store. I was enjoying my little afternoon out just taking my time and browsing at everything. What's the rush right?
Well, I finally made it to the baby section in the back were I needed to get diapers and formula. I loaded up my cart with these two items that amazingly have already put a major dent in my spending amount for the day. I can't wait till Andy is 1! No more $20 cans of formula every week.
Ok, so I'm still in the baby section and it's been another 5 minutes. I start noticing my stomach getting upset so I decide to swing by the bathroom while I'm in close proximity. It would not be good to wait and then have to sprint from the frozen foods section all the way to the back of the store. So off I go to the bathroom. I'm still browsing as I'm walking hoping that I don't miss something or God forbid forget something that I came for. This is where it starts to get interesting.
Somewhere on the way from the baby section to the bathroom I have this weird feeling. I don't even remember what thought may have struck my mind to make me have this feeling, but I just remember feeling like I had forgotten something. I couldn't figure it out. And then suddenly it hit me! WHERE IS ANDY??? (Panic) The next few moments are kind of a blur. Never in my life have I been so dumb! I must have had 50 or so questions go through my slowly diminishing brain in less than 5 seconds. Here are a few of them in no particular order: 1. Where is Andy? 2. Didn't I have him with me? 3. Did I leave him at home? 4. Did I leave him somewhere in the store? 5. Did I bring him? 6. Where's Andy? 7. Oh my God, where is Andy? 8. Did I leave him in the car?...........whether or not this was question number eight is too hard to say, but after asking myself that one I knew exactly where Andy was! I had left my son in the car!!!!! Can you believe it? I was in complete denial! As I was running out of the store after leaving my cart somewhere in the middle of the clothes section I was still trying to convince myself that "THIS WAS NOT HAPPENING"! How could I be so stupid and forgetful. I mean it's one thing to forget to get your kid a drink or forget to let them play on the computer, but how can you forget your kid in the car for 20 minutes while you just go browsing through Wal-Mart!!!!
I'm sure if social services got a hold of the video survelliance at my local Wal-Mart, they would have seen a "twenty-something, brunette, capri- wearing woman" running through the store, knocking people out of the way to get out the sliding glass doors. Not my finest moment!
I make it out to the parking lot in record time and run to the side of the car. I unlock the car (at least I remembered to lock it, right?) and open up the back door as quickly as possible. There he was....my precious baby boy.....sucking his thumb and smiling at me! I was so relieved yet so upset at the same time. He was totally oblivious of his mother's stupid memory lapse! He looked at me as if to say, "Hey Mom, where ya been?"
Tears started to fill my eyes in all the thoughts that flooded my mind about what could have happened. I sat there in the car for a few mintues just holding him and apologizing to him. He didn't seem to care, he was just enjoying the attention. I decided there was no way I was going to get my shopping done today. I was a basketcase! Plus, I wasn't about to waltz back into the store I just came running out of with a baby in my arms. Can someone say, "DEAD GIVEAWAY!"

I am fully aware that the story I just told is forever imbedded into history. I have dealt with the guilt all afternoon otherwise I would not have even thought of posting this entry. I have come to terms with my stupidity, yet I am so thankful that my little Andy came out of it with no emotional or physical scars. Now, I am ready for the horrible comments that will befall me! Bring it on! I only ask that you think back on all the times you yourself did something stupid and didn't have the nerve to admit it to all of blogland.

7 comments:

Michelle said...

I think that it is very brave of you to share your story with the whole blog world. Even though I have never done that myself, I have done other stupid things that involved my children like...forgetting to buckle the infant seat in and having it tumble around the backseat during the first corner that I turn. I'm sure that there are even worse things, but I've tried to block them out!!! I'm glad that Andy is OK and I hope that you don't let yourself feel bad for to long, just count your blessings and praise the Lord for him taking care of Andy for you during your brain lapse. :)

Caci said...

Hey....I will not say anything mean to you because everytime I got in the car after Annalisa was born I would find myself asking Cole if she was actually in the car with me. I always feel like I am forgetting something, and my biggest fear is that it is one of my kids. I really knew you had forgotten your son when I was reading the part about the pharmacy aisle and I just knew. I can relate. Just last night I went to the movies with Ben, Windy and Bubba. Before the movie started, Windy and I went ot the bathroom. After the movie was over we were leaving and I knew I should have some car keys to drive home with but I couldn't find them anywhere. After panicking and trying to remember everything I had done prior to the movie, I remembered the trip to the restroom and some part of my memory told me I hung them on the coat hanger in the stall. Back to the bathroom. No keys. Then Windy asked the guy who takes your ticket stubs if anyone turned in any keys. YES! He had them! I know it isn't my kid, but it makes me feel like it is only a matter of time before it is! I love ya girl, and you are a GREAT MOM!

Anonymous said...

This is a very good reason why we should stop at two children. You lose so many brain cells during each pregnancy and delivery, that by the time you've had three, well, you do things like leave your kid in the car at Wal-mart!! :) Never done it, girl, but I sure can identify! Taking care of the little boogers all day long every day is enough to drive anyone to such insanity!!

Michael said...

You're not alone, Mel. When we go to church, Leah always gets the kids out at the door, and then I go park the van. Once, Sydney was sleeping, so Leah asked me to bring her after I parked the van. Between the door and the parking spot, I forgot all about that. As I walked in past the greeters something felt not quite right and when I got in and saw only three kids in the lobby I knew. Thankfully, Leah was busy talking so she didn't see me come in, but it was really embarrassing to have to go back to the van and then walk past the same greeters again carrying a child this time. There was no covering it up.

Anonymous said...

I still nominate you for MOM of the year.

You are one of the best I have ever seen. Anyone who knows you will agree.

Anonymous said...

Does wanting to leave a kid in the car count?

Michelle & Crew said...

Hey Melissa, What a story! I am sorry for your misfortune but I am so please that Andy is alright. Just know that many of us "wonder moms" have our weak moments. This was yours!