I got BURNED!

I don't know why I do these things to myself. When I say "things" I mean party planning things. I do love to plan parties, but I always get a little bit stressed.
I've been working on the My Little Pony party for Emily this week and I'm pleased to say, I'm almost done! Earlier this week I was assembling the "pony tails" and "pony manes" that each girl will be wearing at the party. I got a great pattern for the manes on a website. It just calls for headbands, yarn and felt. Pretty easy, right? I thought so too...that is before I received 2nd degree burns while using my hot glue gun. Let me give you the blow by blow.
Ok, so I've got my supplies all set up and ready on Jimmy's grandmother's Secretary desk in my front room. I've already pre-cut the "manes" if you will and I'm preparing the headbands with the felt ears. I of course have come up with the brilliant idea to make each girl's pony ensemble a color of the rainbow. And because Emily is the "birthday girl", she will be the "rainbow" pony. Ok...so back to the story. During this particular incident I was working on the "blue pony" ensemble. I had managed to get the white felt ears attached to the headband with know problem. This was the 3rd mane out of 7 that I was to make for the party. In making the first two I had been able to straighten out any kinks that always come with trying to make something from looking at directions from a print-out pattern off the web. I hate it when they just write out the directions and expect you to know exactly what their supposed to mean. Where are the pictures? I need pictures!!! And I mean step-by-step pics, not just the picture of the finished product. How does that help?
Ok, so I guess by the third mane I was getting lazy and distracted. The girls were bugging me...."Mom, can I have a snack?" (guess which one that was)....."Mom, can I help you? I'm really good at cutting stuff." Meanwhile, I don't know how many times I had to tell them, "Don't get close to this glue gun. It will burn you!" I lost track at around time 17. So...to make my point....I was distracted!
I was trying to put on the center of the ear. You know the piece that is usually pink that represents the inside of the ear. Anyway, I was making the blue mane so I was making the blue pony's inside ear blue. Makes perfect sense right? So...here we go...I'm aiming the gun...the "glue" gun...and I squeeze out just enough molten lava glue (that's what it should be called) onto the bottom half of the blue ear piece. This is wear I get lazy! I go to place it carefully (at least I thought "carefully") onto the ear and something's wrong! What is that smell? And what is that excruciating pain I'm feeling on the tip of my right hand index finger? Oh, My God! I have a blue felt ear attached to my finger with "molten lava glue"! I immediately jump up out of my chair, shaking my finger ferociously up and down hoping that the stupid thing will detach itself from my finger. I realize now I must have looked like a "spastic retard" as my sister would say. Finally, after what seemed like 5 minutes (probably only 3 seconds) the blue ear flew off my finger! Whew! What a relief! Wait a minute? Oh, my God....what's "that" smell? Why is my left hand thumb burning! That stupid blue ear had conveniently flown off my right hand index finger only to land on my left hand thumb. The "molten lava glue" was still plenty molten too! What an idiot! And what are the chances?
Meanwhile, Peyton and Emily see the whole thing. I'm sure they were wondering what in the heck "Momma" was doing dancing around flayling her hands every which way. It was an awful experience. I wanted to throw the stupid glue gun out the window! But, I knew I still had 4 more manes to make. Oh, the life of a PARTY PLANNER! It's a dangerous one!
I will refrain from showing you pictures of my wounds....I am afraid they are too horrific and graphic in nature!

I'm really going for the food

Most of you know that I'm making a trip home to Louisiana in May, and I'm very excited! I'm going to see my little sis graduate from high school as the valedictorian of her class. I'm looking forward to seeing my family and friends. But most of all, I'm Going for the FOOD!

I know I've been making Colorado seem like the perfect place to live, and I'm still convinced it is just that. But....it does have one major flaw. It lacks all of my favorite food!
Everybody knows that "Southern" cooking is the best! It doesn't get much better! So, I just thought I would share with y'all what I'll be dreaming about until that wonderful day when my plane touches down in my own personal "food heaven"!

First and foremost on the long list of yummies, is CRAWFISH! I can't wait to get my hands on 10-12 lbs of the spicy little critters. I've been deprived for way too long. For any of you that have dined with me over a steaming hot pile of crawdads you know all too well the seriousness of the event. There is a fine art in partaking of these things. And don't let the price per pound fool you. You would think that with the money you have to spend to get enough of these things to fill your belly that it must be like fine dining. You couldn't be more wrong. There is nothing fancy about peeling off a crawfish's tail (crawfish guts and yellow fatty substances flying) and plopping them in your mouth. A serious crawfish fan would order 5 lbs., a large coke (with straw), extra potatoes and corn, and only one napkin. Why only 5 lbs, a coke with a straw and one napkin? You people disappoint me! First, like I said I can put away a good 10 lbs of crawfish, but it takes a few minutes to get through them all. The last thing you want to do is order 1o or more pounds and then let them sit there and get cold while trying to eat them. Thus, the "5, 5, 5" plan. Always order 5 pounds at a time! The coke with a straw thing should be self-explanatory. This is to prevent you from having to stop peeling when thirsty. Just lean and sip. Finally, the one napkin is for clean up naturally. Put you just need one. Crawfish eatin' isn't for sissy people. You don't have time to worry about the fact that you have crawfish juice running down your hands and passed your elbows. Or that some of the yellowy fat stuff has been ejected onto your shirt and upper eyelid. It will all still be there when your done. Don't risk the crawfish getting cold and rubbery to take care of these minor details. Just eat them and enjoy!

Ahh, now we come to my next favorite yummy! Southern Maid donuts! Again, a true staple in any southern home. I grew up enjoying this deep fried delicacy. What a treat it was to see my mom or dad walk through the door holding a couple boxes of these "rings of joy". I was so hooked on these things that I could smell them when I walked into a room. I remember coming home from ball practices or late nights out and one of my parents would have purchased the donuts a little earlier and hid them some where in the house. It never failed. I could smell them every time. To this day if there is Southern Maid within 100 yards of my nose I'll find them, or die trying! I'm comin' Southern Maid!

Every once in a while God smiles on me and says "Here Melissa. Why don't you enjoy another one of life's finer things." And I say, "Ok, I think I will God. Thank You! One of these times was when I was anxiously awaiting the delivery of my Southern Maid donuts in the drive-thru window at the local S.M. on Mansfield Rd. when I noticed the wonderful red, white and blue ICEE sign in the window. "You've got to be kidding me! They sell ICEE's here too!" I couldn't believe my eyes. Not one, but two of my favorites in one fell swoop! Those Southern Maid people have my number.....and lots of my money!

It wouldn't be a trip to good ole' Shreveport without a few lunches or dinners at Nicky's Mexican Restaurant. The best mexican food ever! And I should know because I've probably eaten there a few 100 times. This is a Templin family tradition. You want Mexican. You go to Nicky's. There is no other! We ate there so frequently that by the time we were seated we each had our drinks, the basket of chips, bowl of queso and chile con queso were already there waiting for us. And our dinner orders were already hanging over the cook's grill in the back. Nicky's Rocks!!!!

It's just not fair, why do the southerners have all the good food. Maybe the fact that all the good food is down there is why Colorado is the "second skinniest state" in America. These mountain people don't know what they're missing! I can't wait to come down there and each a peanut butter sandwich on a Mrs. Baird's piece of bread. It's really just the simple things in life that I love!

Last, but certainly not least! BLUE BELL ice cream! Oh, the joy! Another Templin family tradtion. After a long day of stuffing your face on the aforementioned items above, we all snuggle up in our recliners with a good movie and a MASSIVE bowl of Blue Bell ice cream. My favorites: Chocolate Sundae and Milk Chocolate. It just doesn't get much better than that!

Man, am I gonna have some "sweet" dreams tonight!!! It's all about the food!!!

Counting sheep just keeps you up!

Ok, it's late. 12:18am to be exact. I'm still up! What's the deal? I mean I know that I'm a night owl, but for someone that has to be all the way across town by 8:30 in the morning (all three kids too) shouldn't I be in bed asleep by now. You would think! But no, instead I'm sitting in my front room blogging on my computer.
The whole "counting sheep" thing is a crock! Has any body really ever done it? Honestly. I tried it once and it just postponed the inevitable! I don't want to count to 1, 539....I just want to SLEEP!
I don't know what else to blog about so let me just tell you what I did today.
1. My son woke me up at 6:15am. This is not normal. I hate mornings!
2. Finally got my son out of his bed at 6:53am. He wouldn't shut-up.
3. Layed next to my son in bed while he took his bottle. I slipped in and out of consciousness for the next 5 minutes.
4. Bam! Knocked on the head with the empty bottle. Good Morning to me!
5. Went down stairs to fix breakfast for the girls. Those Pop-Tart packages can be hard to open.
6. Listened to my son scream at me from his exersaucer while trying to get ready.
7. Gave him some cheerios to muffle the screams.
8. Picked up the last 10 out 45 that he decided he didn't want to eat off the floor in my living room.
9. Debated if I wanted to shower now or later. Decided later.
10. 9:15. Yes! Back to bed for my son. Don't you just love morning naps.
11. 10:30. Crap! Got to be at the ballet studio by 11:00.
12. Get dressed. Get girls dressed. Ah, man. Get the still sleeping kid dressed.
13. 11:02 arrive at ballet. Combining classes today. Not good, Emily cries.
14. Console my daughter for 20 minutes. Not working. Spank daughter for not stopping crying.
15. 11:24 leave ballet studio really mad!
16. Cool off period for Mommy!
17. Lunch
18. Play with my son. Finally, he's in a good mood.
19. Amazed at my girls ability to play computer games without knowing how to read.
20. 2:00pm. Another bottle. Another nap. Good times!
21. Girls in bed. Son in bed. Me in bed (yeah, whatever!).
22. Iron huge pile of clothes that I've been putting off for a week.
23. 3:00pm. STILL IRONING!
24. 3:45pm. STILL IRONING!
25. 4:00pm. Done.
26. Next. Put away clothes pile that is in the basement.
27. Kids wake up.
28. Start thawing chicken for dinner tonight.
29. Spill $10 worth of formula on the floor while trying to fix another bottle for son. Managed to save about $3 worth off the floor. Don't tell Andy!
30. More playing with kids.
31. Start dishwasher over again, because the first time the soap dispenser didn't dispense! Love that!
32. Cut up vegetable and chicken for my Cajun Chicken recipe.
33. 6:00pm. Jimmy's home. Relief!
34. Eat dinner. Make Banana bread for tomorrow's bible study brunch.
35. Bath time.
36. Pull out banana bread too early.
37. Put banana bread back in oven. Go dry girls hair.
38. Forgetting about banana bread in oven.
39. Oh, yeah. I forgot the banana bread. Run down to get it out. Almost burnt.
40. Finish hair.
41. Put Emily's recital costume on to take some pics.
42. Have talk with Emily about "ballet breakdown". Last one? We'll see!
43. 8:15 kids in bed.
44. More cleaning.
45. Download pics.
46. Do some blogging.
47. 11pm. Take shower. Dry hair. Curl hair.
48. Watch t.v.
49. Try counting sheep.
50. Not working. Blog.

Wishing for a "magical" swimsuit

I had a rough day yesterday so when Jimmy got home from work he let me get out of the house for a while. These excursions can be bittersweet. "Sweet" because I can regain my sanity that was taken away from me bit by bit all day long. But, "bitter" because I usually come back to the "real world" with some type of purchase.
Last night was no different. While eating a nine piece order of chicken fries and slirping down a coke icee from Burger King I decided that this was probably not too good for me. No wonder I haven't seen a difference in my weight or shape after jogging for the past two weeks. I'm still eating crap! Duh! So, I left Burger King swearing off the junk for a while.
On to Kohl's. What a great store. I didn't have the kids with me last night, so I took advantage of it. I looked at every single rack they had in that store. I came to the swimsuits and decided "what the heck". I picked out a few and walked hesitantly to the dressing room. The whole way there I was thinking to myself, "What are you stupid. Do you really think these are gonna look good on you. Do you think they're "magical" swimsuits or something. Maybe if you put one on all the flab and stretchmarks on your pale white thighs will just disappear." POOF! GONE! I really think that is what I was hoping would happen.
Ok, so I'm in the dressing room with one of the 5 swimsuits on and I'm completely mortified at my reflection. I mean I knew it wasn't gonna be pretty, but I hadn't prepared myself for "totally horrifying"! Why am I doing this again? Someone please remind me. Why do swimsuits have to even exist? Can't the human race get away with never having to go into the water? I mean what if we brought back those cool swimsuits from the 40's and 50's. You know, the ones that almost cover every inch of your skin. They brought back bell bottoms and platform shoes. Let's bring back the old swimsuits. They could modernize them a little bit, and I bet those things would be flying off the shelf! Ok, maybe not. Whatever!
Well, after trying on all five of the suits I decided that the one pictured was the least "horrifying". Don't get me wrong, it still looks awful, but I figured it would give me a goal. The "swimsuit" goal. We've probably all attempted the "swimsuit" goal at least once in our life. If not, your day is coming so brace yourself.
I think if I didn't have small children that are about to be begging me to go to the pool in a few weeks I could get away with not having to purchase the stupid thing. But that's not the case. I have three little midgets wanting to swim. And not one of them knows how to swim, so I can't just tell them to go get in the water and leave me to sit on the lounge chair under my beach towel. No! That would be too easy. Instead, I have to walk all three of them to the water and stay there with them. Thus, visually scarring each and every set of eyes on the way. Sorry folks!
It has to stop. I'm putting my foot and the cupcakes down!

What's wrong with this picture

Directions: How many things can you find wrong with this picture? Circle them.

Does anyone know what's wrong with this picture? I can tell you exactly what's wrong with this picture. This is not a real mom and this is definitely not her kid. Does the advertising world really think that this is what it is like to go grocery shopping with your kids? I think they must be in denial. Let me tell you all what it is really like to go grocery shopping with your kids.

1. "Pseudo mom and child"
First, let me just point out the obvious, this "pseudo" mom only has one "pseudo" child with her at the store. And this "pseudo" child is obviously a good little actress, because she appears to be content with staying right with her "pseudo" mother. Ahh, how sweet! Come back to reality folks! This photo does not reveal the whole truth.
2. The Smile
If this were a "real" mother she would definitely not be as "chipper" as she appears. We all know that even the thought of grocery shopping is enough to put us into a deep dark depression. I would rather spend a week eating pancakes, and tuna fish than make out the "list" and go to the store.
3. Kid pushing cart
What? What mom in her right mind would actually let the child push the cart. Does she have unlimited amounts of money and patience? Has she never heard of the saying, "You break it, you buy it!"? I think I let Peyton push the cart one time...for maybe 4 seconds...something broke...and I bought it! Fun!
4. No screaming baby
Yup, you couldn't put your finger on it could you. Not only is there "one" child, that child is like 5 or 6 years old. Where's the screaming infant sitting in the front of the germ infested cart? You know the one that you try to calm down by opening anything and everything you can find in your cart before you even buy it. Oh, you know you've done it. How many times have you put the open box of Ritz crackers or the half empty bottle of juice on the conveyor belt. I'm not too proud to admit it.
5. The List
I don't know about y'all, but either this mom forgot her list and is having to remember her list by visual memorization, or she gave up trying to piece it together after her infant shredded it and ate items 6-13 on the list.
6. Overflowing cart
Surely, this woman is just getting started. I mean where is the cold jug of milk that is squeezed in next to the baby. Or the piles of food strategically balanced on top of each other based on weight and temperature. I don't see the three loaves of bread or the 4 boxes of cereal that you have to buy in order to make each child (including husband) happy. The picture is not willing to show you the bottom of the cart where you have stuffed the 24 rolls of Charmin and the huge box of Cheer. Don't forget the 8 roll pack of paper towels that you have to purchase everytime you go to the store. How many paper towels can a family of 5 use in a day? If you only knew.

I could go on, but I don't want to depress anyone. Can you tell that I am just trying to put off the inevitable. Tonight I convinced Jimmy to order a pizza. Maybe I can get away with the pancakes tomorrow night. I'll let you know. In the mean time, mothers, do yourself a favor and wait for "Daddy" to get home or pay for a babysitter when going grocery shopping. It's just not worth the misery!

Smarty pants!

Well, folks here she is. My sister Megan, aka Miss Smarty Pants! You wouldn't know it by looking at this picture, but we just found out yesterday that she is Calvary Christian Academy's "Class of 2006" Valedictorian! Congrats! I'm so proud of her. I'm really not all that surprised, seeing as she has always blown me away with her intelligence. She excels at everything she does! I'm so excited about flying down there in May to see her graduate. Now I guess I'll get to hear a cool speech too! This may be the first speech at a graduation that I'll actually be interested in hearing. Maybe she'll even mention her AWESOME sister in it! (hint,hint)
Anyway "Mego", I'm so proud of you and all you have managed to accomplish in the past 18 years. You are amazing! I'll be there soon to put away 10-20lbs of crawfish with ya! Tell Shane to get ready! I'm bringing our crawfish hats with me. Love ya!

Jogging "pays" off!

I was out on my evening jog tonight gazing at the beautiful sun setting behind the Rocky Mountains. We have such a good view of the mountains from our neighborhood. There is one area of my jogging trail that gives me a view of Pikes Peak. It is just so beautiful up here. On one side of me was the sunset and on the other side of me was the full moon making its way up into the sky. Ahhh! Ya'll are jealous aren't you? You should be! It is actually possible to jog a good ways up here without breaking too much of a sweat. Anyway, I figure by posting these pics and talking about the mountains enough I could convince some of you to move up here too. I figure my "powers of persuasion" must be pretty good considering I've gotten you all to start blogging. Come on, you know you want to!
Anyway, the point of this blog was to show you what I came across while jogging. Like I said, I was just minding my own business doing a little exercising, when I saw something on the ground where the street meets the sidewalk. As I got closer my heart started beating faster and faster. Not because I was about to hurl from exhaustion, but because I could see what it was. I couldn't believe my eyes. No, it couldn't be...or could it...no....that's just silly....oh my gosh, it is....a $100 bill just lying on the ground. Of course I pick it up. Just when I thought life couldn't get better, I realize the stupid thing is FAKE! Can you believe it? I was ticked!
I finished running home, trying to beat the sunset so that I could go grab my camera and take some pics for my blogging viewers. It wasn't until I got home and after a re-enacting the money lying on the sidewalk for my picture that I noticed what it said on it. I of course, knew that it was fake from the moment I touched it but I couldn't help but laugh when I actually read the writing on it. Can you all make it out from the pic. For those of you with bad eyes, it says: "THE OVERWEIGHT STATES OF AMERICA. For anyone serious about losing weight....". The back even says, "LOSE WEIGHT NOW" right under whatever building that is on a $100 dollar bill. Anyway, my point is how ironic that while out jogging and trying to "lose weight now" I stumble across a piece of money that God knows I'm gonna stop to pick up, tells me that I'm "overweight" and I need to "lose weight"! Pretty funny, huh? I at least thought it was. The best I can figure is that some gorgeous, amazingly skinny, non-mother type is out driving around throwing these FAKE $100 dollar bills out the top of her BMW convertable knowing that us poor, digustingly fat losers that are eating styrofoam crackers and getting shin splints are gonna stop and pick them up. My mission is to find this woman and strangle her with my MP3 player cord. Wish me luck!